I have a mix of friends from every walk of life, both young and old. I love what I learn from each one; sometimes it is what to do, and other times, it is what “not to do!” While there are friends that we make a conscious decision to have in our life, we don’t always have a choice. Some we are connected with because we are born into the same family, others we work with, and then there are those we are connected with through community activities such as sports or church. Our choice is in the depth of the relationship.
Of all the people in our life, it is seldom we find the perfect relationship. With some, it is easy and enjoyable, while others, the relationship is very trying and challenging. There are times God puts people in our path for us to either be a source of help for them or to knock a few edges off of us.
I’ve heard people talk about not keeping those in your life that cause strife or conflict. Perfect world, right? Do away with those who are hard to get along with or take too much effort to have a relationship? Sometimes if we take the time to get beneath the layers that a person has built around themselves, we find a beautiful friendship that will be with you through the thick and thin of life. I’m glad there have been times in my life people didn’t walk away from me; they said I was worth it. And, there are those in my life that I am thankful that I didn’t walk away from; today they are some of my most cherished friendships.
What is the definition of a perfect friend? I think it is someone who loves you on your worst day when you are at your lowest. On days when you have nothing to give to the relationship but garbage, they are there. A true friend will find you at the bottom of that heap of rubbish and pull you out, or perhaps sit awhile with you in the middle of the stench, then crawl out together. A true friend will make you laugh at yourself, see yourself through their eyes (the good, bad, and ugly of your actions!), and they will cry with you when your heart is hurting.
Because of the pains we experience in life, we often send up defenses to guard our heart from more hurt. When you guard your heart, make sure you don’t close the door. Leave it open enough to discover what God is doing either in your life or the life of someone He has placed in your path. And, there will come a time you will know when God is ready for you to close the door if needed. More importantly, He will close that door for you.
Look at every opportunity to get to know someone, learn from them, and grow with them or grow because of them. Your life will be richer by the people in your life.
All that said, remember to keep people in your life that are encouragers and love you for who you are on your worst of days. Make sure you have a friend with whom you can laugh at the silly things in life and cry together during the sad times. Have a friend that you can spill your thoughts out to knowing that it will be okay if what you are saying or feeling is not “correct,” but who loves you enough to listen and gently guide you in the right direction. Have someone in your life who enjoys some of the same things that you do, such as your hobbies, finding a unique restaurant in an out-of-the-way-place for lunch, perhaps cheering for the same sports team, or reading and discussing good books. Have a friend that knows how to give a hug. Since we probably will not have our mothers forever, you may not find all of this in one person; you may need several friends.
Friends, true friends, are good to have in our life! Be one and find one; cherish those you have.