The Memory Garden Story

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  Lazy days in the Memory Garden!

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  Blue was my mom's favorite color, so the furniture (that came from her garden) was painted a bright blue!

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  Coleus (Coleus blumei)

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  Old bricks form the borders around the garden beds

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  Monkey grass adds a colorful border with the old bricks

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  Entrance created by stacking pavers

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  The old oak tree is the focal point of the Memory Garden

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  Bird feeders, including hummingbird feeders throughout the garden

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  Purple iris

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  Coleus planted around the oak tree add color with their beautiful foliage.

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  Daylilies in bloom add a striking color with the purple iris

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  An entrance with Confederate Jasmine

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  The Memory Garden gives a place to heal as you dig in the dirt and a source for friends and family to have a lasting legacy.

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  Purple Iris after the rain

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  Spiderwort plant—opens in the morning, closes in the evenings

The year 2008 was a hard year emotionally for our family. Our son was deployed (Iraq) and both my mother and our son-in-law’s dad passed away unexpectedly.

In mid-December of 2007, my mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She passed away early February, just 6 weeks later. My heart was heavy and I turned to gardening as my source of healing. There is just something about digging in the dirt that heals the heart and brings me closer to God.

During January, while my mom stayed with me as I cared for her, she asked what we would do with all her plants from her yard. She wanted me to bring them to my house for us to enjoy, especially her roses and daylilies. She asked that they be put around the beautiful oak tree that could be seen from one of my side porches. Neither us knew that just 3 weeks later she would be gone and I would be grieving.

With a hurting heart, I began in early March to dig the plants from her yard and move them to mine, creating what became a Memory Garden. Each time I made a trip to her house, digging in her dirt, my heart would break and the tears would fall. After many trips, and much digging, the plants that could be moved, were placed in the appropriate places as close to the oak tree as they could be and the garden began to take shape.

The benches and chairs that my brother had built for her were placed in the garden, along with the bird feeders that she enjoyed. All of her garden art was placed along the path through the garden and intertwined with the plants. Two entrances to the garden were created, and stone angels from her garden art collection were placed at both entrances. Rocks were gathered from her garden beds and used to create a focal point around the oak tree. Roses, daylilies, and anything else that could be transplanted were placed in the area around the oak tree and the garden path.

Iron porch railing from her front porch were taken down and a new wooden porch was built as we prepared the house for rental. The iron railings were used in the Memory Garden as an arbor for one of the entrances.

Even objects that she collected and had on display in her house found a new home in the garden to add whimsy, such as a ceramic cat.

My friends and other family members took part in the creation of the garden by gifts of time, plants, or objects. As the garden began to grow, my heart was healing. Everything was happy in its new home, everything that is except for the roses. And, my mother loved her roses. They needed help and I was not gifted with the care of roses as my mom had been. I needed intervention so the roses could survive!

Early morning on the first Mother’s Day without her, I poured a cup of coffee and headed out to spend some time in the garden, to sit and reminisce about the wonderful life my precious mother had given and shared with her children and grandchildren. As I walked through the garden, passing the area where just the day before I noticed how sad and pitiful the roses looked, I was amazed to find one red rose in bloom. Not just a bud but a beautiful red rose in full bloom! It was a beautiful gift that God gave me from my mom. It was unexpected and without a doubt, bloomed only because of the work of the Master Gardener.

The Memory Garden has evolved to become a place of solitude and peace for our entire family. Since my mother’s passing, I have also had two brothers to pass away, so the garden includes plants that were given in their memory. We have included plants that were favorites of my son-in-law’s dad, the purple irises and some daylilies that were transplanted from his yard. The Confederate Jasmin that climbs over one of the entrances, has been planted in his memory by his wife as well as azaleas. We also have included a plant, the Spiderwort, that came from his yard. It brings with it a story that each year as it blooms brings laughter between our family.

I enjoy our Memory Garden and would encourage anyone who has experienced the passing of a loved one to consider creating a garden in their memory. It gives a place to heal as you work creating the garden, a source for friends and family to be a part of creating something with you, and it has a lasting legacy.